TEACHER : Why are you late?
WEBSTER : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign
WEBSTER : The one that says, 'School Ahead, Go Slow.'
_____________
TEACHER : Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the
floor?
CINDY : You told me to do it without using tables!
_____________
TEACHER : Jo, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
JOHN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L'
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
JOHN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
_____________
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
SARAH : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
______________
TEACHER : George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : George!
______________
TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't
have ten years ago.
WILLIE : Me!
______________
TEACHER : Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
______________
TEACHER : Ellen, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
ELLEN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Ellen..... Always say, 'I am.'
ELLEN : All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
_____________
TEACHER : 'Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?'
JOHNNY : 'Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day,
same time.'
_____________
TEACHER : 'George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you
know why his father didn't
punish him?'
JOHNNY : 'Because George still had the ax in his hand.'
______________
TEACHER : Now, ! Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before
eating?
SAM : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
_______________
TEACHER : Desmond, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as
brother's. Did you copy his?
DESMOND : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
______________
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people
are no longer interested?
PUPIL : A teacher.
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